My Unusual Athletics Injuries

As I said earlier I like running. I never said I was any good at it. And I have just learnt how horrendously bad at it and unhealthy I am! (The only muscle I really exercise is my brain and even that is a rare workout) Anyway, here is a hopefully amusing list of my injuries (excluding general aches): - 1 x bruise in hip and 1 x battered elbow Instead of jumping over the high jump bar, I did this odd rugby tackle jump on to the bar and somehow trapped it between my elbow and hip. Those poles really hurt too - probably a good incentive to clear it then! - 2 x bruise on ribs Whilst running my 4th and longest race of the day (remember me saying I didn't do long distance...? Yeah.) I kind of died figuratively speaking. I had a huge stitch down my ribs and everyone was yelling at me to 'run it off' (Said the ones not running it!). So I did this awkward little jog thing whilst clutching my ribs (you know, in case they fell out or something) but turns out, I was gripping my ribs so hard, I've left a hand shaped bruise! - 2 x grazed palms Because apparently, just finishing the relay race and passing on the baton isn't enough. It helps to stay upright and not fall flat on your face afterwards. Or more specifically, flat on your hands. - 1 x dodgy right eye For some reason my right eye decided it literally couldn't cope with the sight of any more laps and went all blurry :/ It's fine, I don't need to be able to actually see where I'm running... - 1 x slightly twisted ankle Not from the running, that would be too common a injury for me. Nope I hurt myself after the race whilst walking down the stairs to get a healthy ice cream. Gravity as always won :( - 1 x sore throat From all my crazily high pitched 'team encouragement' and the even higher pitched squeal I made every time I tried to do the long jump (again, another event where you are actually supposed to jump!) There you have it. Despite, or possibly even partially because, of this list, I had fun. And even better, I am still currently alive so all is well. But I should probably stay away from stairs, ice cream, cheering, running or jumping. Or maybe just movement in general... Anyone else had any interesting sports related injuries?